Post by Bellatrix on Dec 3, 2021 12:45:13 GMT
This is a new section I see and don't like to see it empty, so I'll go first
I remember having a good old sob when my kids left home for the military and to unis, I was full of anguish and longing. I remember it well sitting in their respective rooms and probably as every parent feels, wishing I'd done more and challenging myself whether i'd done a good enough job. Although they came home at holidays, it took me several weeks to come to term with my new role.
Looking back, that time was a rehearsal for when they really left, when they met partners and got their own places, all of a sudden it was a real empty nest especially when the last one went, I felt like howling at the moon. I am still having plenty of those days. It's hit me harder than I ever imagined it would. I know it should be a time of fresh beginnings and doing all those things you couldn't when you had a house full and obligations.
Last year was the first Christmas when they all didn't come home for Christmas day, we didn't notice it as we were moving house and everything was upside down, packed in boxes and Christmas was almost like an inconvenience as we had so much to do, moving 1st week of January.
This Christmas I have felt really strange, I got upset last week and told OH there was no point in putting up a tree and doing the house with the vigour that I would have done, without kids, it wasn't Christmas, all my Christmas memories are wrapped up in them all and I couldn't get to grips with it being so different, even though we are visiting them all (apart from 1 who is abroad) in the run up to the big day.
My OH has been firm (but kind) and said we absolutely have to.. excuse the cliche... own the day and make it our own, start our very own traditions, purposely do things differently and start to get excited about being different. It sounds easy to say I know but he is right and I've now got my head around it is possible to enjoy the few days of Christmas in a totally different way and do exactly as I please.
For anyone passing by this forum, please feel welcome to post about how you feel or join in with us so you don't need to feel alone with your thoughts whether you are on your own or an empty nester, you can do something different, have your own Winterfest
A winter walk in the forest/woods feeding the birds on Christmas day, taking in nature if you have any near, or spend the day doing your favorite things and totally pampering yourself with your favorite food, watch a great film and eat that huge bar of chocolate, talk to your friends/family on video call.
This year is our very first WT secret santa (great idea from Cj) everyone was invited to join in and it has added a lovely distraction from everything else that is going on and given me that childish secret mischievous feeling back. So if anyone is wrestling with feelings, come and join in with sparkly Christmas on here